The phuket disaster let mi rethink how fragile and weak life is....ur loved ones might juz disappear from your side like datZ....haiZ....mi also din haf any mood to celebrate 2005 countdown...mi veri bei guan hor?? hahaha...but alright lar..maybe mi feeling abit depress right now..sch is starting to get to mi..feeling e first bit of stress liao...hauhahaha..i wonder i make it thru it? but nevertheless i m enjoying sch at e same time also...so strange dat one can experience so many emotions at a time...haiZ..2005 cuming...i guess i shld make my resolution here...i wish to be a better me....esp my attitude....towards life....

wa...so fast liao...already third day of sch....today was a short sch day...coz its wed mah..2 lessons were cancelled so actually i onli attended one lecture today..haiz..e lecture hor...realli dunno wat to say le...teacher say until so fast...bcoz i don haf a j2ee base as compared to my other sch frens...so i lose out lor...dats y i was abit blur today in lecture lar..onli understand half of wat e teacher was saying..i tink i muz kempatae le...haiz...den after sch today jh accompany mi to the optician...so sian...yuan lai y my eyes haf been hurting so much these few days was bcoz of my torn contact lense left eye....so sian..dat means i haf to replace lor...tml still muz go to optician to check my eyes r ok b4 i can replace...or e optician will not recommend mi to wear contact lense anymore...oh no??? dat means i muz wear glasses forever?? oh dear...i hope not...den after still muz rush to sch for tis semester first tutorial lesson..haiz..abit not used to it...come to say...actually i missed my last time class also...hope everytink goes well for mi....^^*

first day of sch!! actually came to sch today quite excite...coz like veri fun..and was quite bored in the holidays..but so ..tired...mi today came home wif a big headache..dunno y also..mi now juz feel like sleeping..e lessons r ok...but alot of pple i nv seen b4 also...haiz...so many notes to print...and seeing we actually lu gi coz like every assignment we cannot copy last batch one...so sad....shou bu liao...onli e first day..hai..tml got lesson till 4...

harlo harlo~~wat a nice sunny day today!! haha...mi sitting in a beautiful place called the Library...wahahaha...juz bcoz my comp cant check sch mail...so i'm sitting rite here...arrgh...anyway...juz to sum up for these holidays..i haf been doing nothing = zero = mei you dong xi...wahahaha..die le lar..still say wan to buck up on my programming...haha...sigh sigh sigh..dunno wats going to happen nx semester...will i meet scary pple?? or teachers?? or maybe i will meet my white horse there...haha..ok lar..jokin nia...mi today in good mood..and i found a veri gd way to combat negative thoughts i had in the past....i juz haf to replace them wif gd thoughts...its dat simple actuallly...arrrr...mi juz wan to go off liao..cant stand e Library...its too quiet..:)

blog ah blog...mi still feelin veri down these few days...but i tink is expected de lar...who can get over in a period of short time..at least not mi...my feelings r not so versatile....juz like i thought in e past i could get over any person easily...in the end i also hurt so many pple...mi also dunno wat to do now le...i'm sad...but i cant be sad forever...i still gotta move on...ya noe...there's nobody who can understand and give mi all e an wei i need..even in front of all e best frens i haf i juz still joke all e time...even in front of him...i don understand y all my bravery came from..haha...e energy still to get on wif life...maybe i too zhong gan qing liao...so landed into such a state...i mean who else can blame other den mi? bcoz its mi refusing to move on and make myself miserable right...haizzz...i'm so veri useless...*mood*depress;*doing*listen to s.h.e songs....;

haiz...juz another day...my nose feel awful...all stuffed up...dunno y my emotions juz suddenly went on tis roller coaster ride today...from moody to happy to troubled ba...i'm a evil gal...maybe i shld go to hell for wat i'm doing now...i don recognise myself anymore...arrrrgh...i juz wan to be myself sometimes...love e pple i wan to love...is dat so difficult..y does everything haf to turn into hatred...where is my happy ending....where...i'm juz an evil gal...i lost my direction...i'm a bad gal.

wa...so fast le...its e 2nd last week for holidays...haixxx..and i look at myself. wat i haf accomplished?? realli nothing sia...although i can say its a gd rest ba...but cant help tinking i wasted so much time..my x-mas holidays...haixx...its hasn't been anytink special for me, i guess. h.m. is going to fly off to japan nx wk..how i xian mu her o....onli mi haf to be stuck all times in s'pore...anyway realli looking forward to sch-reopening....bi jing its my last semester le...i wish to do better...haha...anyway e weather nowadays veri rainy...although i scare wear slippers may fall down but e weather veri romantic ah...hahaa....ok liao now mi go off le...go walk walk c wat can buy during tis festive season...hehee....^^*

hmm...back to update my blog again..so wat has been up for mi...actually nothing much...juz went kbox ys wif yun and jh...wa seh..super ex sia..but nevertheless we sang songs until we dunno wat to sing..for us its usually not enuff time to sing finish de...hahaha....but i manage to sing JS songs...veri shuang...e feeling of holding a mike da da da....juz wondered if they haf to kick us out at 5 pm i tink i would be realli not worth it leh...lucky no...can stay until 7 and its us zhi dong go make payment one...haha..today din go out...coz no money le...so started to make artistic things in my room..eh bracelets and stuff...to occupy my whole afternoon...e weather is so damp..i hate it...tml maybe going queenstown visit xq...maybe sun bian go queensway shopping centre also ba...maybe..i 'm not even veri sure how to get to xq workplace..erm...though she did give mie e direction.sometimes i can be a road idiot also...argh esp e place is not my territory...ah...we see how it goes...ltr sure tune to channel 5 to watch rerun of spore idol...i wanna record down e songs sang by Slyvester!!! =) 2 more weeks to sch re-open....

another boring wed....oh no no..i take back my words...k..today iS e s'pore idols grand finals held at indoor stadium...woW...it will be veri exciting tonite...haiz....i wish both of them luck..bi jing they rehearse so long le..juz for e title of s'pore idol?! today morning weigh myself again...wow..abit over 45kg..jialat...realli cannot le..mi too lazy to jog again....coz i usually feel veri faint in the mornings..and i do haf a history of asthma so i get breathless veri easy leh..wa seh..dangerous to health sia..but i tink i realli wan to exercise..so ys got go lib...look at health mag...c how those pple slim down...hmm..so it inspired mi to start another slight round of exercise...u guess?? haha.. mi live on e 11th floor of my block...12th highest...so ya i m going to climb e stairs everyday when going home..all e way to 11th floor...gd for training ur limbs sia...like dat maybe can burn off some of the sickening cal dat i'm getting from nowwhere...haha...wish mi luck again...going out le...bai~~~~

another boring wed....oh no no..i take back my words...k..today iS e s'pore idols grand finals held at indoor stadium...woW...it will be veri exciting tonite...haiz....i wish both of them luck..bi jing they rehearse so long le..juz for e title of s'pore idol?! today morning weigh myself again...wow..abit over 45kg..jialat...realli cannot le..mi too lazy to jog again....coz i usually feel veri faint in the mornings..and i do haf a history of asthma so i get breathless veri easy leh..wa seh..dangerous to health sia..but i tink i realli wan to exercise..so ys got go lib...look at health mag...c how those pple slim down...hmm..so it inspired mi to start another slight round of exercise...u guess?? haha.. mi live on e 11th floor of my block...12th highest...so ya i m going to climb e stairs everyday when going home..all e way to 11th floor...gd for training ur limbs sia...like dat maybe can burn off some of the sickening cal dat i'm getting from nowwhere...haha...wish mi luck again...going out le...bai~~~~